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Do Stay At Home Moms Lack Ambition?

Stay at home mom

Today’s post may be considered off-topic maybe – or a bit of a rant perhaps.  And, as always, I am just going to start writing and see where the post even goes…..

Yesterday, I was looking through a few of my RSS feeds to see if there was anything new I should read about.  I stumbled onto a blog post about Kate Gosselin doing Dancing with the Stars, which basically asked readers what their thoughts were on moms who had ambition and how they were seen by others.

The post isn’t what got to me – (even though Kate Gosselin is not one of my favorite people, I don’t really feel it is any of my business how she conducts her life).  What got to me was where the comments started heading.

I was a stay at home mom for a couple of years before I started working from home.  And, my mom was a stay at home mom my whole life.  So, when I read comments that are truly ignorant and completely out of line towards stay at home moms, I tend to get a bit worked up about it.

Here is the original post:

Is Mom Ambition a Bad Thing?

It was a good post, which opened up to some great discussion.  But, when it got to the comment that:

Most ambitious moms has more to offer a child. Someone that cooks,cleans, watches soaps, and shops all day has few skill to transfer to their young. Also, moms that have to ask their hubby for spending money show that they are not adults or responsible. If mommy does not have goals, daughter won’t either.

Wow!  Just….wow.  Comments like that just really get to me!

I can’t believe that in today’s society, women are attacking each other for their personal decisions – but as if that isn’t enough, they are still spewing forth such completely ignorant garbage!

First of all, that is NOT what stay at home moms are doing!  Sure, maybe there are some, but to put every single stay at home mom into that category is just insane!

Most stay at home moms that I know, are doing pretty much what your daycare worker is doing day in and day out – only difference is, that daycare worker is seen as contributing to society because she has a J-O-B which she gets paid for every day!

Guess what?   When your kids are home all day, there are meals to make, and a house to keep organized.  When kids are in school or daycare all day, your house doesn’t get near the mess that it does when they are home.  And, because most of these stay at home moms have sacrficed a good career – (I gave up a career as a nurse) – the family finances are usually very tight.  So, there days also consist of trying to make do with what they can afford.

We don’t lack ambition – in fact, I think any woman who chooses to give up a career and stay home with her children is very ambitious!  No one can even imagine what is involved in being a stay at home mom, but it seems like there are sure a lot of people who feel they are experts – because they go out and contribute to society by working, they feel that they are “above” the ones who are simply staying at home.

And then to say that moms who aren’t working can’t transfer any skills to their children?!  I can’t even begin to write about how far from the truth that statement is!

I learned more from my mom than anyone else I know – and I am hopefully passing on that knowledge to my kids.  I would far rather be passing the skills of how to be a good person, how to care for people you love – and skills like that compared to maybe teaching them the skills of say, internet marketing or building an effective website!

I get really upset by these kind of comments, and I can’t even begin to put them all into a post like this, because I know that everyone has such opposing views.

Personally, I can’t understand how anyone can judge or make any kind of statements on how someone else chooses to live – be it going to work outside the home, staying at home with the kids – or even working from home.

In the end, we are all moms.  We are doing the best we can.  If you don’t agree with how I am doing it, that is fine.  You are welcome to raise your children your own way, but that does not give you the right to say why you think your way is better than mine.

And, I would never choose to do that to another mom.

What are your thoughts on these kinds of comments?  Do people seriously still believe that stay at home moms are not being good role models for their children?  Why do moms always feel that they need to attack other moms for how they are doing things?  There will never be a right or wrong – all we can do, is do our best.

 

**Photo Credit:  Yoshi Aka

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